I Experience the World Differently....

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I often wonder how many people ACTUALLY listen to the lyrics of songs. When you love a song, do you ever think about WHY or WHAT it is that makes you REALLY identify with a particular song or artist? I do-ALL the time.

Music is as important to me as books. I'll listen to anything that makes me feel. A lot of my music choices depend directly on my mood. If I need to be pumped up, I love Pop/Dance. If I'm sad or thoughtful-Country's my choice. If I'm mad, you can bet I'll be ripping Heavy Metal. If I'm in between-who knows?  When I belonged to Columbia House (yes, I'm aging myself here)  I used to confuse the HELL out of them with my selections of artists.  And I loved every second of it.

Since I attended The Write Stuff pre-conference, I've been thinking about one concept I've come to accept about myself: I EXPERIENCE THE WORLD DIFFERENTLY.  And that's why I write.  Or is it the other way around:  I'm a writer, therefore my experience of the world is different?  Either way, it really doesn't matter.  I see things others can't.  I know things others don't.  (I wish I learned this like twenty years ago-IT EXPLAINS SO MUCH!)

And my closest friends have helped to reinforce this AND remind me that it's all good. For my birthday, Sera and my beautiful niece made me CDs of songs that relate to ME!  And I'll probably wear them both out by the end of the month.  They're both writers (though my niece hasn't accepted yet that she is!) and see the world in the same magical way I do.

But, really, it was my other writer friend Rebecca Rose that prompted this whole new perspective on music.  While we traveled to Pennsylvania for the Write Stuff, she had me listen to  Blank Sheet of Paper by Tim McGraw.  And it's written from a very unique point of view.



Can you see the scene that's painted?  Can you feel anything?  Or do you hear just another twangy country song?

Maybe this song matters so much to me because I once sat at a blank computer screen.  I was scared.  But I started typing, telling myself no one would ever read it, so it didn't matter.  I went back a thousand times and continued  typing.  I've revised again and again.  The words have changed, but the sentiment is still there.

And now, I have my completed novel.  It's not perfect yet, but I'm getting ready to put it out there when it is.  I'll be terrified, I know.  But I'll do it anyway.

So, if there's something you need to write, just do it.  No one has to read it.  But I'm willing to bet, someday, you'll be ready.  And it will be so worth it.

Breaking me out of the spell I was in....

This weekend, my husband and I were listening to the radio. A countdown was on from 1981. I wasn't a teen then, not even close! I was actually 7, but this song brought me right back to being young, family life, and the vague emotions that accompany those memories; the times that led up to my teen years.

And those are the feelings I write about. It helps me to understand them. It inspires me to keep creating.

So many times I think that I write for nothing. That no one is going to care about some girl that I create from the depths of my soul. And then I remember...for once, it's not about anyone else. It's about me. I need this. I want this. And if I'm fortunate enough to be able to share it someday, I will be one of the lucky ones.

Many times throughout my life, I have been labeled "brave". Yes, I use the term 'labeled' because that is not how I see myself at all. What is brave about wanting to speak and be heard? What is brave about baring your soul? I find it all a little selfish. Helping others helps me feel good. And to me, no amount of knowledge can compare to real life experience.

And now that I have broken out of my spell, I feel more free than ever. When I write, I feeling like I am walking on air. I will probably never be a great American hero, wearing a cape and flying, but at least I can create my own endings. And maybe, just maybe, they might matter to someone else.

But until then, I'll just keep writing because I can!

Old English vocab word of the blog:

Plebian: n. (in ancient Rome) a commoner; a member of the lower social classes