"Maybe I should just move," I think to myself as I stew over the piles of clutter in my house. It would certainly help me weed out many of the 'things' I think I need. And, it just might teach my kids how to let go of junk.
But, alas, moving would create new problems...like leaving my husband. We live next to his parents and he's made it very clear that he's happy. Besides, we live in a great neighborhood, can afford the house, and, well, I kind of like the man, so leaving is out.
My next thought it to RUN, far and fast. That, too, raises sticky issues of abandonment. I'm not going anywhere. I sigh in defeat as I dream of a life where everything is easy to find,use and put away. But life like that doesn't exist, especially when one spouse is traveling for work. Add two kids one big, yellow dog, and the new beta fish to the equation and you have a home in total chaos.
The truth is, I'm looking for a lifeline. I know there has to be one. One of my faults is that I live day to day. I have a visceral aversion to it the word 'planning'. I cringe at the thought of, UGH, knowing what I am doing from day to day. But every once in a while, I peek ahead to see if I have a reprieve in my blurred life.
And that's when I found my prize. My golden salvation is in black pen across the calendar. I had nearly forgotten about it because it occurs EARLY next month, Saturday June 6th the be exact.
I AM RUNNING AWAY!!!!! Well, more like flying away. At 6am (YUCK, but worth it!) I will board the plane with two other moms. Three hours later we will arrive in Florida, far away from kids. We will spend the next five days reading, lounging, talking (ACTUALLY finish conversations), eat warm food, sleep, drink wine, laugh, relax and just plain enjoy ourselves.
I can't wait! Thank god it is nearly here. In the mean time, it will help me try to hold it together.